Published in Buzz Weekly
Due to an overwhelming stack of work and my general anti-social, lazy behavior, I decided to stay in Friday night with a microwave dinner. Motivated partially by curiosity, partially by lust for the cheese connoisseur, I hitched a ride to Euro Mart in hopes of finding an entree of gourmet quality but frugal price. Unable to decide amongst the overwhelming variety of tantalizing choices in the freezer case, I closed my eyes and stuck my hand in. I ended up with Deep Foods’ baingan bharta, a self-proclaimed, “vegetarian delight,” consisting of roasted eggplant, tomatoes, onions, peas, garlic and blended spices. Having only $5 in my wallet, I was pleased that it only cost $4.50.
My stomach, eating itself at this point, convinced me to skip the congenial small talk at the register and hurry home. As expected, I had little trouble preparing the frozen entree. Poked some holes, stirred a bit, nuked it a little more, stirred again---within minutes I had a delicious meal all for myself thanks to the conveniences of modern appliances. It smelled wonderful, but I was a bit surprised at the texture of the baingan bharta. Unlike the image on the box, which portrayed a consistency similar to a thick stew, the actual item exemplified the stereotypical microwave dinner with a soupy, semi-disappointing appearance. Maybe if it had been presented on a gold platter garnished with saffron and parsley, instead of a generic plastic box, it would resemble the display. Who knows?
Fortunately, my room was dark and comfortless enough that aesthetics seemed less important than immediate compensation for my emotional unavailability. Keeping an open mind because I had no other dining options for the evening, I set a place for myself at my desk, facing an institutional-white concrete wall, and allowed myself to indulge a little. Let me tell you, had I not been confined to the limited space between my sturdy desk and chair, it’s highly possible that I would have lost my balance and fallen to the ground. Never have I been so impressed by a frozen dinner! Was the perfect combination of coriander, ginger, salt, garlic and turmeric a result of the delicate, loving care of the New Jersey manufacturer? Or was it a stroke of luck? Either way, I was sold. I spent the next 15 or 20 minutes in sheer heaven, savoring every morsel that came into my mouth. This was definitely a couple steps up from my usual favorites of Michelina’s chili mac and Uncle Ben’s rice bowls. The marinated vegetables and distinctive blended spices created a zesty flavor similar to local Indian cuisine. Granted, it was still of microwave dinner quality, but surprisingly unique and appetizing.
The meal was more than anything I could have asked for. It exceeded my expectations from the advertised description of a “vegetarian delight.” I enjoyed it so much that I began ravenously licking the plastic container until every drop of sauce coated my tongue. My face was covered with the remnants of my meal, my stomach was full and my room smelled a little bit, but I was elated. I felt a little embarrassed afterwards for this pathetic moment of uncontrollable gratification, but then again, I was alone so I guess it really doesn’t matter.
Baingan bharta is an excellent option for anyone with dietary or monetary restrictions. Satisfying a low-calorie, low-fat, low-carb, or vegetarian diet, this salubrious entree allows neurotic health-nuts to free themselves from a night of hard work in the kitchen and pretend to be lazy like other Americans. Although it is suggested on the box that the meal would be better complemented with naan bread or rice pilaf, I felt the robust flavors were enjoyable on their own--much like myself. However, if you happen to have a romantic microwave dinner date, you can easily share the meal as the serving size is for two. Also, at the price of $4.50 a box (which tends to go on sale from time to time), you really can’t go wrong. Dietary restriction or not, the baingan bharta is a bangin’ buy worth a try.